We all make mistakes, and we all endure the mistakes of others. Carelessness, forgetfulness, callousness, selfishness, disrespectfulness — all the nesses. These are usually errors in judgment, accidental blunders, or misunderstandings. They can feel hurtful, cruel, and malicious for those on the receiving end.

That’s why forgiving is so hard. And that’s why forgiving and forgetting is nearly impossible.

Despite your pain and anger, you might still be willing to forgive. You might be willing to gather the courage, the trust, and the confidence to say, “I forgive you.” But forgiving and forgetting? That’s when you may think, “Suntia, I just can’t forget the pain.”

When you watch this video, you will see that instead of forgiving and forgetting, we must forgive and forge ahead with trust, compassion, and accountability.

Consider this your opportunity to begin to heal from the pain of past challenges — together as a team — instead of feeling like the victim of your partner’s behavior.

But first, you must understand that forgiveness is essential to healthy, happy relationships. That’s because we, as human beings, are imperfect. I hate to break it to you, but you and your partner will make mistakes.

It’s simply inevitable. You cannot expect perfection from your partner if you are imperfect (I know, you are amazing…  but perfection is just not realistic).

And that’s what you must realize: How you react to your partner’s mistakes should reflect how you want your partner to respond when you make mistakes.

We all want compassion and mutual respect in our relationships. These qualities are invaluable as we traverse the bumpy roads of courtship, dating, marriage, and starting families.

They will help you take on challenges as a united front. Individually, moving on from your mistakes is nearly impossible, but as a team, you can overcome and rise above.

Forgiveness in a partnership is only real and effective if there is compassion and accountability.

When you forgive your partner, you choose to say, “I am no longer defining you by the mistakes you have made”. And when your partner accepts your forgiveness.

He is choosing to say that he will work on being better, learn from his mistakes, and be conscious of his actions. Together, you can determine what accountability looks like in each situation.

If your partner splurged on an extravagant shopping spree for himself, and now you can’t replace your broken stove. It would be best to work together to determine accountability in this situation.

Maybe your partner returns some of his purchases, works overtime to earn extra income, or seeks financial advice on budgeting to ensure this mistake does not happen again.

That’s teamwork, and that’s accountability.

I know it’s not simple or easy, but I’m here to help.

Are you debating whether cheating is a forgivable offense? Are you heartbroken that your partner has cheated yet again? A Virtual Coaching Session can help.

Forgive and Forge Ahead | Blog Article | Suntia Smith | All Rights Research | Greenville SC